Excuse me... I'm wallowing here...

[bluecastle]

Today I am apathetic

And pathetic

Full of crass procrastination.

I am sad

And tired

And mad for no good reason.

I hate things I shouldn’t .

And love things I shouldn’t .

Feeling weighed down. trapped. stilled.

It’s frosty outside and foggy inside.

I used to want, for a while back there, oblivion.

Now I just wanna stop feeling oblivious.

Haunted. Taunted.

I could rant ad nauseum.

But I don’t want that.

All I can do is wait here in the fallow fields, holding on to hope.