(no subject)

[bluecastle]

So somewhere I think I saw someone challenging others to poetry every day in October, and I thought, "hey cool, I love to do found poems. I should do that. Yeah, that lasted one day. :| But maybe I can do 31 poems in 31 days and still make it mean something. But hey, I've done one poem so far. Not strictly a found poem. But I did use a page out of the same romance novel I've been using for years now for these things as the starting point. Then it sort of went places from there. And dude it's depressing. But at any rate I did SOMETHING ...

Somehow the word "seven" at the top of the page turned into the title "event horizon"

Gazing in the mirror
That Sunday morning
His
Mortifying
Extraordinary
Professed affection
Brought a glow to her cheeks.

But it wasn't long
Before
He simply
Learned to look through her
And then he was gone
Leaving her
Crumpled
And shattered.

more later as I write them. I keep going back and forth on leaving the word mortifying in there. it seems wrong somehow in combination with the other stuff in that first part, but I really like the combination of opposites that 'mortifying extraordinary' makes...

Comments

[carolyn-claire.livejournal.com]

I like "mortifying"; it says something about the depth of feeling that was both inspired and overcome by his profession, sort of a wealth of emotional background in a single word that makes the second half make more sense and feel like an even greater loss. She gave up something of herself long before he gave her up, and that makes the ending even more tragic and more real. Good choice.