why fried food is my friend.

[bluecastle]

Through a confluence of crap mood, NaNo eating my soul, and spending all day yesterday watching a America's Next Top Model marathon I have rather fallen off the planet.

Just had a quick troll over my flists actual journals but skipped over the comm stuff to try and save my sanity.

So if you've got fic you think I should see, best drop me a comment. I want to read stuff, I am just not sane enough to go wading through ALL THE THINGS to get to the GOOD THINGS...

My house is a pig sty, nearly ALL my dishes are dirty, and a resident mouse came out last night to move the dirty silverware around and laugh at me.

Very demoralizing weekend. I had been hanging onto a slim hope that I might actually be able to churn out 50K during this NaNo month. And I've been trying to push myself all week to get 2K a day. But then all my muscles seized up and my brain shut down, and well... I am at something around 18K which is pretty good on the whole, but I was shooting for 22K by today. This is what happens when I try and force myself to write. I seize up. I sit here with my fingers on the keyboard, and sometimes I can't even force myself to look at the screen. My eyes slip shut and I find myself channeling my inner autistic child or something and very rarely when I get to that point can I push past it and actually write anything.

Pressure, it is not my friend. But this is about the point that I gave up last year, and I would rather not just give up. I do that far too often it seems.

Dunno. Not helping my mood, all in all, but will try and keep on keeping on.

This entry was originally posted at http://valancy-joy.dreamwidth.org/135381.html

Comments

[paragraphs.livejournal.com]

I should point out I just now have more words than I do, as this morning I made up for alot. :) But just BARELY. I hope to get more today, trying to get my head back on straight after it fell off a bit. Ouch!

[valancy-joy.livejournal.com]

It probably didn't help any that my cool writer friends, when I told them about trying for NaNo at lunch this week were kinda 'well that sounds a bit stupid. why would you want to do that?' and they couldn't wrap their brains around it, and just kept asking, "now what do you WIN?" ugh. anyway... I am blaming sore muscles for this week's low output. does the brain count as a muscle?? LOL

[paragraphs.livejournal.com]

There's been a lot of nano-hating around, hasn't there? But there's alot of positives to jumping into the boat and having fun with pushing yourself, I think. So pfft to your writer friend. I admit the 'win' thing matters not to me...the thing I am winning is good times with friends. So there! LOL.

Mmmm not sure on the brain...but the neck is full of muscles and holds it up so why not?

[valancy-joy.livejournal.com]

wait. this is supposed to be fun???? LOL yeah, I kinda miss out on that most days... :)

[paragraphs.livejournal.com]

LOL yes, it is fun!!!! :) Granted, mostly I've just met with the people I usually write with anyway... LOL!! We work well together!

[paragraphs.livejournal.com]

You might like this:

http://blog.bookviewcafe.com/2010/11/13/novel-in-a-month-or-not/

[valancy-joy.livejournal.com]

I sort of wish I had a writing group. I think it would help encourage me. and I'm always better when I can bounce my ideas off people. The BFF will listen but since I never see him I don't really get the chance. but it could also overwhelm me since I mostly think everything I write is not that great.

But I'm glad you have your group. they sound awesome :)

[paragraphs.livejournal.com]

We don't crit each other--we are purely a writing-encouragement-and-bonding group. It works best. All of us work at a different pace and if someone does have something to look at, we toss it to each other. But usually we meet every Thursday at McALlister's, have fun with the waiters, sit at the same table and write--sometimes Cid reads, Linda does a lot of book reviews. We eat dinner, drink too much ice tea (unsweet for me, they have sweet!) and after we have enough and get our goal words in, we trot over to Border's next door and buy books! LOL.

It is awesome. I found them via Nano last year, after nano was done. :)

[valancy-joy.livejournal.com]

that sounds so great!! something like that would be good for me, as I'd have someone to share the PROCESS with. LJ etc gives me a way to share the product, but if you have no product... then... :)

I don't think the local NaNo is organized, tho. I haven't seen any emails. Granted, I haven't gone looking for them either, so...

doing some journaling to get to my 750 words a day (think this is day 21 and I'd like to keep my flamingo badge) and then I am taking the night off. My neck and shoulder didn't like the chairs at my parents house. Gosh, I am so stiff and sore!!!

eep. but enough blather from me... back to work!

[paragraphs.livejournal.com]

Did you sign up for your Region? That's how i found everything going on, all the write-ins, meetings, book drive etc. Every region has one or several municipal liaison. Oh I went and looked at yours--and you are so right. Very tiny group there. Mine is huge, covering Dallas-Fort Worth, Mid-Cities which is several cities between here and Dallas, plus Stephenville and all the little bitty towns around. So we have big groups. AHH! Bummer. Pout. MOVE HERE! lol

[kel-reiley.livejournal.com]

hahaha WAS I SUPPOSED TO BE WRITING?! yeah, that didn't happen, but i did get my vid on! :D

good luck with your words, dude

[valancy-joy.livejournal.com]

for amusement sake I just went and read the local meetup threads... looks like only about three people active there! I don't think we have a ML as I have not seen any posts or anything. which for a college town... ???

anyway... taking tonight off and seeing how I feel tomorrow. (and or start packing for that move to TX LOL :)

[valancy-joy.livejournal.com]

Thanks! might readjust thinking and just shoot for writing every day and damn the wordcount. or something :)

<3

[kel-reiley.livejournal.com]

sounds like a plan

[alba17.livejournal.com]

Do you have any interest in joining a writing group on LJ? I'm part of one where there are daily posts where you can report your word count and you can post any time asking for help or feedback on anything writing-related. It's really whatever we want it to be - it's just a few people. cheer_me_on Mostly Merlin people, but it's for any kind of writing. If you're interested, let me know. But it's all about sharing the process, which I agree you never get to do otherwise on LJ. I feel too self-conscious to talk about it much on my own LJ because there are so many incredible writers around, I feel completely incompetent in comparison. So I like having this other place which feels very judgment-free.

Oh, let me tell you about this fic I read. I want to rec it on 12steps. Totally awesome. http://sebastiansais.livejournal.com/2441.html. It's a Pendragon Day So You Know Good Shit is Gonna Go Down by sebastiansais. (Never mind the coding, something's screwing it up.)The fic's much better than the title, LOL. As long as you don't mind outside OC POV. Try it even if you don't think you like that, because it really works. Modern college AU, Arthur/Merlin.

[valancy-joy.livejournal.com]

Firstly, that rec was a)good and b)interesting as I'm not sure I've read anything with an OC POV in Merlin (and not many places otherwise) and of course, c)hot! LOL Made me laugh out loud a couple times with the narrator's snarkyness by times.

And gosh that writing group sounds great!! I really could use something like that!!

thanks all around!!!

[alba17.livejournal.com]

I'm so glad you liked that fic! kel just rec'd that author's other Merlin fic today - I was planning to read that one too, but didn't get around to it yet.

Writing group - just go to cheer_me_on and click on join. Membership is moderated, FYI. I told the mod you're interested. She's just the person who thought of the group - she's very nice. It's a small group who are active.

[valancy-joy.livejournal.com]

thanks! have clicky-ed away :) and bookmarked those 12steps recs to read too!! whee!